Dear Babies,
This morning, I find myself thinking about the “how are we going to” and “how will we do” things with twin infants. Mommy and Daddy are not the neatest people. Don’t get me wrong, things are usually fairly clean, but I gotta be honest, sometimes dishes seem like too much, sometimes I forget that the vacuuming needs to get done, and Daddy and I are what I call “droppers” which means when we get home, everything we carry gets dropped on the kitchen table and most of the time does not get cleared up or put away. The dropping actually drives me crazy, but not crazy enough to change it, ha. So how are we going to adapt when there’s bottles everywhere and toys and burp rags? I know we’ll get it done, we’ll do the adulting, we will face the day. Hopefully you’ll forgive us our messes in the beginning.
There have been quite a few unsure moments in this pregnancy with you guys. It started way back at the cusp of the 2nd trimester. My first trimester was pretty much a breeze. I had next to no morning sickness, I didn’t puke at all. I had kind of strange symptoms like restless leg syndrome and I craved hot mayo (like on chicken sandwiches or BLTs, not by itself ew!) and nacho cheese. Our 12 week appointment, Daddy and I got to meet our OB together and we talked about what the rest of the pregnancy would look like and I was so full of hope and excitement! It was all going to be perfect, and frankly I attributed this to the fact that I hadn’t had any morning sickness. Silly me.
A few days after our appointment, I was now 13 weeks and I woke up in the morning and I was bleeding. I think that’s probably the moment that parent worry set in for the first time. I was so scared. Daddy was at work, Mommy was home alone, and I didn’t know what to do. I called my doctor’s office and the lady who answered was very calm and kind. She said, we’ll see you when you can get here and then proceeded to move mountains to make sure an ultrasound would be available when I got there. Daddy’s aunt (who is the same age as Mommy and Daddy) Shannon drove me to the hospital and stayed with me while I was biting my nails and nearly silent with tears rolling down my face.
They got us into an ultrasound, asked a bunch of questions, and then there you were on the screen. I could see your arms and heads and legs. I could see you moving! Our ultrasound tech, Jess, started talking about her experience with having twins and it calmed me down. She caught one of you sucking your thumb, and the other arching your back. It was a miracle. What she did not find was any reason for the bleeding. That reassured the doctors that everything was fine. It didn’t really reassure Mommy, but she tried really hard to trust the doctors. They told her to give it a couple days to subside and then we would go from there. So I did. This happened on Monday, and Thursday Mommy was still bleeding and now having some pain. So we went back to the doctor. Again, they couldn’t find a reason for the bleeding. Finally Sunday, the bleeding stopped.
That was the scariest week of my life at that point. I think it was made extra scary because there was so very little evidence of you to the outside world. I wasn’t showing, I couldn’t feel you move yet, it just felt surreal. But you guys are troopers, let me tell you! After that scare, Mommy had a new appreciation for doctors and the craziness of the OB department.
Babies, we really can’t wait to meet you (but we will wait, please stay in there for the whole time you’re supposed to!) and we are so excited. I think now that I’ve written this, I’m going to put some of the dropped items that are on the kitchen table into their proper homes! Or maybe I’ll sit and watch my belly from out here as I can see you roll around and move and stretch. I gotta say, that’s a better show than anything they can put on TV.
Love you my babies,
Mommy (and Daddy too!)
The Koep House 